Posted in Relationships - Online Dating

Wandering in the Fog

I was very relieved when Goose called.  It was as if the fog had finally lifted and now I know what the road in front of me looks like.  I know where to place my next steps to keep moving forward.  In all honesty, I hadn’t gotten past this point yet with any of the men I’d met.  There had always been some tell-tale happening that clearly pointed the direction I was to take.  I hadn’t had anyone make such a choice that affected me so directly.  Goose must really like me.  He must be interested enough to make this big decision.  To see through the fog of his illusion.  That’s a pretty big thing.  It’s rare in my work that someone becomes strong enough, ready enough, to make such a step.  I was happy and feeling pretty confident about this outcome.  I was feeling safe with Goose.

The funny thing about fog is that it covers everything.  Not just the things at a high elevation, but the things down low next to the ground as well.  It can appear to be lifting away only to sink in more thickly than before.  I’m already off to learning my next lesson about the fog.

Goose and I continued to text and talk and email every day.  But it would be a few days yet before we’d see each other again.  Work and my son and my happy feelings about Goose keep me occupied until Friday arrives.  There is a lightness to our interactions.  Goose is hovering above the ground.  The release of the load he’d been carrying was clearly freeing.  He’s full of laughter and silliness and flirty-ness.  We are full of fun.  I didn’t see the light haze of fog still in the air.

On Friday morning Goose called me and said that he had to be on the road for the day at work, but that he’d like to have dinner with me that evening.  He’d be getting back to the work site at around 6:00 pm.  He asked if I’d be willing to drive up and meet him at his place.  It would give us more time together since I get off work earlier than he would.  I agreed.  He made sure I remembered how to get to his house.

After work I drove home and decided to be prepared this time.  I packed a small bag of things to take with me.  A hairdryer is the first thing I put in it.  I knew we’d be going some place for dinner, but wasn’t sure what to wear.  I opted for casual, it IS Friday after all.  Goose lives about 90 miles from me.  Once I finally got on the road though, I called Michele.  She is full of questions.  What had happened between Goose and the Minneapolis Girl? Had he heard from her?  How did they leave things?  I have to admit they are all very good questions.  But I have no answers to them.  What I do know is that Goose is a fun and tender-hearted man,  he wants me to join him for dinner.  AND I have a hair dryer with me.  Life is all good.  When I reached the halfway point, Goose called to see if I’d gotten lost yet.  I told him I’d already turned north and it was a straight shot to his house from here.  Although still 40 miles to go.  He said he’d see me soon.  I could feel the anticipation beginning to build in the pit of my stomach.

I pulled into Goose’s driveway and the dogs met me with wags and sniffs. I felt kind of funny taking a bag with me.  But I knew it would be late by the time we’d have dinner someplace.  I didn’t want to be unprepared again. I reached into the back seat and pulled my bag down onto the floor so that it wasn’t so obvious.  I didn’t want the presence of my bag to create any presumptions.  It’s kind of awkward in the early stages of a relationship.  The way seems so unclear.  Steps are taken with caution.  I guess that implies there are feelings budding.  I don’t want to lose the gains that have been made.

Lights in the fog

Car lights shine dimly in the distance down the long county road that leads to Goose’s driveway.  As the lights become round beacons in the dark, my nerves begin to rattle a bit.  He pulls in the driveway, and the overhead doors of the workshop open.  He drives inside and the doors lower.  The dogs know the routine and I follow them to the workshop.  The light is on inside and I can hear Goose rattling around.  As I open the door the dogs burst inside past me.  They know he has treats for them. I wait as he gives them their treat and then I take my turn as he wraps his arms around me tightly.  I can feel his warm breath against my neck and then his soft lips pressing against mine.  This is the warmth that I’ve been waiting for.  Fog?  Nooooo……..


6 thoughts on “Wandering in the Fog

  1. My reaction on reading this part was ‘Oh *expletive* here it comes, you’re in the eye of the storm, not through it…

    1. There are side effects to being a counselor=type person. You can often see the road ahead before others can. And try as you may, it’s difficult not to react to what you see.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s