Posted in Relationships - Online Dating

There’s The Door

wine-cellar-door

You want to come into my life, the door is open.
You want to get out of my life, the door is open.
Just one request.
Don’t stand at the door, you’re blocking traffic.
~Author Unknown~

A facebook friend posted this on her page.. and I’ve stolen it. Not because I’m a thief, but because it just makes a lot of sense.

Life is changing all the time. Even when we’re thinking we’re stuck, nothing ever changes, every day is the same, that’s just not true. You’re noticing the loneliness, boredom and monotony for a reason. It’s so that you’ll do one little thing differently. That small difference has the potential to change everything. I should know… I’m the queen of change.

People come into and out of our lives all of the time. Social situations as simple as going to the grocery store or filling the car with gas introduce us to new people if we take a moment to notice. To smile or say hi. What can it hurt right? It might be the beginning of the best friendship you’ve ever had. Or a lead to that next best job. Or heaven forbid.. those Match.com articles on meeting the love of your life at the laundromat could be right.

I read a book recently titled, “Getting Naked” by Harlan Cohen. Yeah, I got it because of the title.. but it’s a very good book. The author talks about getting completely honest with ourselves, about who we are. And making peace with the things we can’t change about ourselves, and improving the things we want to change. But then he talks about putting ourselves into rooms. Lots of rooms. Cause that’s where other single, available people are. People who are also reading those Match.com articles. (And trust me they’ll have clean clothes on cause they’ve been hanging out at the laundromat. Just not when you’ve been there.) Can’t you just smell the fabric softner?

So I’ve gotten honest about who I am.. old, short and curvy. (Which is the nice way to say chubby.) But with pretty eyes, cause that’s what Michael, a five-year-old student of mine told me when he was in trouble. (Of course I believe him!) Yes I know it was a diversionary tactic to avoid my wrath for throwing sand on the playground.. but I gotta believe something… so I’m sticking with it.

In spite of my personal naked truth, I still seem to have pretty good luck on the dating sites. I have lots of viewers, a few new penpals, and a new meet and greet every week or two. Trouble is.. they don’t seem to step inside the door to my life.

So as I do, I began to ponder. Unfortunately, I got nothin’ til I saw this very saying on my friend’s facebook page. Thank you Dawn.

The pondering went into over-drive as I began thinking about what’s blocking my doorway. I got out the broom and swept away the cobwebs. Yes, even a spider or two. I got out the dust cloth and polished the wood til it glistened. I even hung a sign on the door that reads, “Pretty Eyes Inside”

While I was waiting for the onslaught of single guys to come piling through the door, I grabbed that naked book again. Flipping through the pages, I realized that I had to get even more honest. Geez! I’ve been allowing people from my past to loiter at the door way. They have regular tables and chairs stationed there, like an outdoor cafe. For crying out loud, there’s even a waiter serving beverages!

My broom got quite the work out. Then I pushed the tables and chairs to the curb. And I had to fire the waiter, because he was already in a relationship. (Go figure.)
Sorry Michael, I had to take the “Pretty Eyes’ sign down. But I replaced it with one that says…
NO LOITERING

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14 thoughts on “There’s The Door

  1. Nothing wrong with having a little cafe on the sidewalk of life. The problem is those darn loiterers. We must remove those who are loitering, always pondering the menu but never making a purchase … or worse yet, those who ponder, then ask for a cup of coffee and spend the next 5 years asking for free refills. As long as there are loiterers, there are no empty stools for those who might truly be interesting in tasting our fare. Good for you J! Now …. where’d I set my broom???

    1. I had a meet & greet last Saturday. He still had a loiterer. He was still very sad and almost cried during coffee. He had no open stools for me to sit at. He was a really great guy. We even work for the same agency, just in different towns. How unfortunate for both he and I.

  2. Hey Jeannie, we called that “spring cleaning” back in the day. Sounds like a great idea. Let the dust fly, ya never who might show up when the dust settles.
    blessings ~ maxi

    1. Funny you should mention dust settling.. someone didn’t like the cafe at the curb, nor the lack of refreshing beverages no longer being served. Hmmmm….

    1. I have been picturing a movie called The Butcher’s Wife with Demi Moore in it. There was a shop keeper that would sweep the sidewalk in front of his shop every morning. Then he decorated his front window to create cheerfulness.

  3. I love you, I love your writing and I love this analogy…I even used it with a client this week. I also like Richard’s take with ‘free refills’….oh Jeannie, my buddy, it takes great courage to date at our age. It’s time you and I had a catch-up as we could make each other laugh with our latest dating exploits! God bless us and our continued hope….we are a triumph of hope over experience. Xxxxxxxx

    1. Hi Jane!
      I don’t know why, but analogies just seem to help me get my purpose put out there when I’m writing. It helps to paint a picture for the reader. The reader can then find in their own memory banks a similar situation in their own lives. From there…. a connection is born. And I’m all about connection!
      I love you too. I’ve been imaigning your swirling laughter all week!
      Lots of love to you,
      Jeannie xxxxxx

  4. Little Michael has your number, Jeannie. Keep the dust flyin’ it will keep the losers away. Take a second look at the ones who walk straight through the door. Hope all is well.
    blessings ~ maxi

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